You're tired of everyone pretending that Valentine's Day is some kind of noble event where we celebrate the power of true love. No, what we actually celebrate, you're thinking, is the power greed. Whether it's flowers, dinner, chocolates, presents, or all of the above, somebody is going to be shelling out a lot of cash, and all you're saying is that there should be some kind of payback. Is that crass? Is that crude? Yeah, maybe but it's also honest. Wear this tee or hoodie and don't get taken.