I'm A Successful Adult

I'm A Successful Adult

$22.99

Style

Color:

Black
Royal Blue
Size

You've made it. You've survived childhood, puberty and adolescence with your limbs and faculties mostly intact. You had many opportunities to kill yourself out of sheer stupidity and you escaped each one. Now you're celebrating that great cultural marker of maturity. You bought vegetables. Well, one vegetable. It is still an important milestone worthy of celebration. Show off your accomplishment with this pure cotton tee that, by the way, is machine washable, so please don't call your mom and ask her how to clean it. Wear this tee when you're eating prunes and perusing your retirement accounts. Welcome to adulthood!

You've made it. You've survived childhood, puberty and adolescence with your limbs and faculties mostly intact. You had many opportunities to kill yourself out of sheer stupidity and you escaped each one. Now you're celebrating that great cultural marker of maturity. You bought vegetables. Well, one vegetable. It is still an important milestone worthy of celebration. Show off your accomplishment with this pure cotton tee that, by the way, is machine washable, so please don't call your mom and ask her how to clean it. Wear this tee when you're eating prunes and perusing your retirement accounts. Welcome to adulthood!

Collections: Funny T-Shirts and Hoodies

Adult T-Shirt

  • Fabric: 100% Soft Ring-spun Cotton
  • Details: 4.5 oz., tubular construction, ribbed crew, double-needle sleeves and bottom hem with taped neck and shoulders.
  • Label: Tear Anywhere


Size Width(A) Length(B) Sleeve(C)
SM 18" 28" 8"
MD 20" 29" 8"
LG 22" 30" 8.5"
XL 24" 31" 9"
2XL 26" 32" 9.5"
3XL 28" 33" 10"
4XL 30" 34" 10"
5XL 32" 35" 10"

Ladies Junior Fit T-Shirt

  • Fabric: 100% Soft Ring-spun Cotton
  • Details: Fashion fit for feminine silhouette, side-seamed, self-fabric collar, taped neck with double-needle sleeves and bottom hem.
  • Label: Tear Anywhere
  • NOTE: Our women's fit shirts tend to run small and can shrink.

Size Width(A) Length(B) Shoulders(C)
SM 16.5" 25" 14"
MD 17.5" 26" 15"
LG 18.5" 27" 16"
XL 19.5" 28" 17"
2XL 20.5" 29" 18"

Classic Hoodie

  • Fabric: 50% Cotton / 50% Polyester Fleece
  • Fit: Classic Fit
  • Details: 7.8-ounce, 50/50 cotton/poly fleece - Air jet yarn for a soft, pill-resistant finish - Two-ply hood - Dyed-to-match drawcord - Set-in sleeves - Front pouch pocket - Rib knit cuffs and waistband - Coverseamed neck, arm seams and waistband
Size A B C
SM 20" 28" 34.125"
MD 22" 29" 35.125"
LG 24" 30" 36.125"
XL 26" 31" 37.125"
2XL 28" 32" 37.625"
3XL 30" 33" 38.125"
4XL 32" 34" 38.125"

For a limited time, buy any 2 items and get free US shipping

For other orders, we offer 3 flat rate shipping options.

United States: $5.99 for entire order.
Canada: $6.99 for entire order.
International: $8.99 for entire order.

Most orders should arrive within 2 weeks in the US, and 3 weeks or more internationally.

If for some reason you have a problem with the items shipped to you, make sure to let us know right away.

We will gladly refund or exchange items within 30 days of your order that are new and have never been worn if you're not in love with them. Items that have been worn will not be accepted for returns or exchanges. Read Our Complete Return Policy

Please make sure to read the sizing chart before ordering to avoid ordering wrong sizes.

If you have any questions, feel free to contact us!