Pizza is the greatest gift the great land of Italy has given to the world. Yes, yes, we know all about the radio and the Renaissance painters, bla bla bla, and we might make a special spot on the bench for pasta, because that is also one heck of an invention, but when it comes to things that make life worth living, pizza
This isn't really up for argument. Either you like pizza or you're wrong. We know you love it so much you seriously considered naming your house "Pizza Hut," and your son Domino wasn't named for your long-lost uncle no matter what you told your mother. Thick crust, hand-tossed, thin crust, white pizza, red pizza--the varieties are endless and you'll never be bored no matter how often you sit down to the round gift of the gods.
Once in a while, some do-gooder will come along and try to cast a shadow of doubt on your pizza consumption. They'll tell you it's fattening, bad for your arteries and a bunch of other stuff that just isn't true.
You can start with the polite response. Maybe they've never tried pizza. Just ask them, yes, abs are great, but have you tried pizza
? If they insist that you change your eating habits and adopt some dreary substitute for your beloved pie, remind them that celery is 5 percent water and 95 percent not pizza. If that doesn't shut them up then it's time to get equally rude. Look them straight in the eye and tell them, "The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza."
That's right, your body and its beauty are a matter of opinion, and in your opinion you're doing great. You got that body by eating lots of pizza, after all, and you're a proud testament to its deliciousness. Hey, you're a superhero and your super power is that you make pizza disappear. If someone brings up fitness, laugh it off by saying your idea of that is "fitness whole pizza in my mouth
Hey, it could be that you're in great shape. Maybe you run because you really love pizza and all that running
keeps you trim no matter how many extra-cheesy deep dishes you down.
In the end, it's nobody business but your own how much pizza you eat. If an extra-large is your personal pan size, we say go for it. Just remember, there is no we in pizza because you're not sharing one bite of one slice of that warm, cheesy delight. And neither are we.